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Friday, July 2, 2010

Self-Worth And Premarital Sex

Life is short, don’t waste time worrying about what people think of you. Hold on to ones that care, in the end they will be the only ones there.” Anonymous

It is obvious that more youngsters engage in premarital sex daily. One factor that encourages premarital sexual relations among teenagers and adult singles is having poor self-image. This is the belief you have about yourself which controls your action and reaction. It determines how you behave in any environment you find yourself. The concept of self revolves around self-image, self-esteem, self-worth and self-respect.

Your self-image may not be your self-worth. It is the opinion you have about yourself which could be wrong or right. It often resolves around what you think others think of your person or qualities or make-up.
What people think about you is usually false. They may misrepresent you. You are not whom they think you are.
When you begin to accept the false opinion of people on whom you are, you begin to feel worthless and frustrated especially if their opinion is negative.

Self-concept is your own opinion of yourself. It is only you who knows whom you are. It cannot be determined by others or how they classify you.

Most importantly, your opinion about yourself determines how you choose your values, select your goals, and formulate your belief system says Nancy Pelt. That’s why you must have the right opinion about yourself. Opinion based on facts, figures and the realities of life. It should not be based on realism or unsubstantiated feelings.
Your response to life events is shaped to a large extent by whom and what you think about yourself.

If you sincerely know and respect yourself, you will demand and command respect from others too. If you place much value on yourself, you will demand same from others. When your self-worth is porous and fragile, you will suffer endless emotional trauma in the hands of others because self-worth is the centre of emotional and mental health according to Van Pelt.

When you have a low self-worth, you begin to think and feel you are not worthy of love, respect, friendship, and success. You live your life at the mercy of others.

Ignorantly, you encourage others to take advantage of you in all areas of life especially pushing you into sexual relations against your nature. You will always be at the loser’s end.
Nancy Pelt noted that feelings of worth are learned, not inherited. This means you can build your self-worth even if you have created a poor self-image. Begin today to do so and never allow people push you around anymore.

Kindly leave your comments about this article.

Baruch Okpulor, The Author of The Irony of Love, Premarital And Extramarital Relationships
Talk to him at

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